very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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