using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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