We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
