I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
BRING THE BAGELS
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
