I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Why is your signature on my underwear?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Randomize
