I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize