So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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