the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize