Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
40s are totally the cure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize