Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
