Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
