bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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