Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
