Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Randomize