I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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