At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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