remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Randomize
