and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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