I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Can I color on your dick again?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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