U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
