remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize