Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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