As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Randomize
