I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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