One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Can you bring me the toilet please
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
