Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
