is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
