Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
