Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
