She said her name was "party"
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
