# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
