WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
