I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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