she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
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I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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