She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
