I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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