Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Shame is for Republicans.
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