Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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