I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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