It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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