i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
we made out on top of his cat.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
