Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Blow job season was short but glorious.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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