Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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