Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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