That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
