Can Purell be used as lube?
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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