The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
