This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
