we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Randomize
