Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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