so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
