I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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